It is human to be angry. The last time I remember being angry was when I’m waiting for forever at counter in a supermarket. It happens frequently when I wait for train to come. Angry visits me when someone tells me that I’m wrong, when things doesn’t happen the way I want it to be, when I talk and nobody would listen and even small things such as when I couldn’t find my favorite Wise Cottage fried potato at 7-Eleven around my area. The problem is not because angry had visited us quite often. Invited or not, he’ll come. But the problem here is that we choose to open the door and let him stay for a night or two. (Without our realization, he had been there for months or even years.)
|Picture from Metallica's album St.Anger|
Alvin Ung* said, “Yeah, I’m getting angry about all the ways that I can’t control anger!” Not all anger is destructive. Control anger with right motives can help us to restore relationships, fight justice, or battle evil. Harris Ibrahim from Saya anak Bangsa Malaysia once asked his audiences: “Don’t you feel anger arouse from you when you see that this nation in distress?” Anger is not necessary destructive but anger expressed in the emotion of angry is danger.
But never the less, anger is often a reaction to our pride being hurt. Anger is a defense mechanism to protect our ego. Anger freezes our reason to think. Angry when someone confronted you about your sinful actions. Angry when rejected by someone you loved. Angry when you were ignored by your friends, colleagues, parents or your boss. Like I said, they visits you… do you invite him in? Are you the one who opened the door for him to enter? Did you said to him ‘stay here for awhile’?
Here are some ‘bodyguards’ that you can employ to protect your house from anger's visits:
Bodyguard #1: Prayer
He is the chief officer to overcoming your anger. I found out that it is hard to stay angry at someone when you are praying for that person.
Bodyguard #2: Confession
I have no problem confessed my feeling to someone I love but to confess my anger toward someone I hate, that could be a problematic. Embarrassment? Yes. Possibility of being ridiculed? Hell, yes. Being released from guilt? Amen. Nothing can haunt you more than the feeling of guilt toward someone. Confession is like showing anger ‘my house is not available for you, good bye.’
Bodyguard #3: Forgiveness
This is hard. Really. One of my ways to give forgiveness toward others is to remember someone that had forgiven me in the past. My mother forgives me hundreds of times before. My teachers/lecturers forgive me billions times before for misbehave in classroom. God of the universe always forgive me trillions times before. If I were forgiven, why should I delay to forgive others?
Bodyguard #4: Reconciliation
Have you been in this situation before? You want him/her to tell you first that he/she is sorry. But on the other side, he/she is waiting for you to say it first. In the end, nobody say anything and Mr. Anger continue to outburst into flame? Reconciliation becomes possible only when someone makes the first move: a hand extended, a phone call, a flower (if it still work), or a word spoken “I’m sorry”.
Bodyguard #5: The Word of God
If prayer is the chief officer, then the Word of God is above all, the chairman of the Bodyguard’s company. Invites him in. Filled your house with His Word:
“Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness that God requires.” (James 1:19-20)
“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” (Proverbs 15:1)
“Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun goes down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.” (Ephesians 4:26-27)
…and many more you can find it in His Word.
THINK BIG “Don’t let the sun goes down on your anger”,START SMALL Pray, confess, forgive, reconcile, and saturated your soul with His WordGO DEEP Remain in the One who say ‘Peace be with you”; anger cannot stand too long if you invite Jesus into your house first.
*quote from R.Paul Stevens & Alvin Ung, Taking Your Soul to Work pg.38