Divorce is often compared to death because the grief is similar to what one feels when someone has died. But of course, that statement is over rated. One thing is sure though, it’s okay for you to cry… Crying, as you know, is a natural way to deal with losses. And divorce – the ending of your family as you know it – is a huge loss.
Cry, I and your aunty are here for you. Crying is not a form of weakness. If you think crying is not cool, then think again. Crying helps you express your emotions and acts as a release valve to let go of the awful sadness and pain that builds up inside you. You will almost always feel better after you have cried. In John 11:35, when our Lord Jesus felt sad about the death of his friend Lazarus, he “wept.” Even Jesus shed tears when He feels sad and angry. Ah, I know, Bel, you may prefer to be alone when you cry… you may feel embarrassed… but don’t be ashamed to cry in front of us or your parents and friends. If they really care about you, it’s a great way to let them know that you need support.
You will feel better, I promise. It might not happen tomorrow or next week or even next month, but eventually you will become comfortable with your new life as a person with divorced parents. Going through a divorce is like experiencing a bad weather. First you notice black clouds, then the sky gets darker and darker… then rain and strong wind. You’re frightened, and you feel like the whole world is coming apart. Then guess what? Everything will change! The clouds will disappear, the wind dies down, the sky bright and the sun shines again. No matter how bad the storm is, the sun will always shine after it is gone. You’ll be fine. In fact, you’ll be stronger!
Dear child, this is my prayer to you:
“The Lord bless you and keep you;
the Lord make his face shine on you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn his face toward you
and give you peace” (Numbers 26:24-26)
THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.