Tuesday, November 12, 2019

As A Man Thinketh #6 How to Overcome Doubt and Fear


"Thoughts of doubt and fear can never accomplish anything. They always lead to failure"
(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

I think it's Napoleon Hill who said: "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." When we spend inordinate amounts of time fearing something or event in the future (not happened yet), many times that which we fear comes upon us. When it does, we wonder why it happens to us, when in reality, we are responsible for the most part for our troubles. It all started with a thought of doubt. Then it causes an emotion of fear, which manifests itself physically as anxiety. Anxiety robs us of our power, energy, and focus. Severe anxiety will not only mess our minds but also undermine our health – and it's all brought on by a thought of doubt. It "can never accomplish anything."

There are three (3) basic ways that help me overcome thoughts of doubt. First, I change my mind about doubt and keep it changed. If I doubt whether I'm going to have enough money to make it to the end of the month, I change my mind about it. When doubt knocks, I pray and affirm to myself that: "God will always provide for me. He is good. And I always find a way to have enough of what I need." Dan Brule advised, "If you are going to doubt anything in life, doubt your limitations."

Secondly, overcome doubt and fear with massive actions. Do the thing you fear and fear will disappear (rhyming, huh?). "Inaction breeds doubt and fear," writes Dale Carnegie, "Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit at home and think about it. go out and get busy." This action-oriented mindset will always work! Trust me. Thirdly, replace fear with faith. Some people say fear and faith cannot co-exist. I disagree. They can co-exist. What's important is which one is greater? If my fear is greater than my faith, it will eventually fail. But if my faith is greater than my fear, success is my inevitable future. Bob Proctor puts it nicely: "Faith and fear demand you believe in something you cannot see. You choose." Think about it!


THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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Wednesday, November 6, 2019

What's So Amazing About Grace? (1997) by Philip Yancey, BOOK REVIEW



What's So Amazing About Grace?
(1997) by Philip Yancey

What's so good about this book? Yancey ignites my understanding of God's grace and challenges me to be a dispenser of grace in my life and faith. When my friend died due to cancer, I was very frustrated but God helps me through Yancey's writing to "wrestle with God" as Jacob did when I read Where Is God When It Hurts? When I was having the crisis of faith regarding the historicity of Jesus' and the Bible, one of the books that helped me was The Jesus I Never Knew. I'm not a Yancey fan or have read every book by him, but when I do, it is timely. The same goes with What's So Amazing About Grace? When I read it, I reflect on myself and there were times (recently) when I'm un-graceful toward others. I called myself Christian, that means I'm the recipient of God's grace for the Scripture says "by grace you have been saved, through faith" (Ephesians 2:8) and yet, I'm behaving like morally-righteous believer. This book is easy to read, but hard to swallow. It is old yet still urgent. It is intellectually satisfying but with a cost: by God's Spirit, I can and must reveal the grace the world is searching for!

When Nicky Gumbel asked "What is grace?" during an interview, Philip Yancey said that he tries to explain it throughout the book, but if he were to give a definition, he said and wrote in this book: "Grace means there is nothing I can do to make God loves me more and nothing I can do to make God love me less. It means that I, even I who deserve the opposite, am invited to take my place at the table in God's family." I love this definition. Grace doesn't depend on what we have done for God but rather what God has done for us. We can read about this truth all over the New Testament. It's not new! "In Christian theology," explains Yancey, "Jesus reversed [the] ancient pattern: when the servants erred, the King was punished. Grace is free only because the giver himself has borne the cost." Grace, the last best word, is so desperately needed in the world today.

The church, of all places, has abused this truth. Sadly, some (if not, most) churches communicate un-grace by how we treat sinners (of different kinds), apply laws and moral legalism, judgmental and by its lack of unity. In the book, Yancey points out about his childhood church (I recommend reading his shorter book entitled Church: Why Bother?) was very racist, and other heart-breaking stories that people who have been and are in the church today reading this book would agree to some degree. I'm part of the church and so, I too, act in un-grace ways. Christians are more concern (rightly so) about homosexuality than divorce; attending religious activities than attend to AIDS patients; and quick to judge with open eyes than to listen with open ears. There are times for everything – love and hate, justice and mercy, forgiveness and punishment – but the church must remember that "dispensing God's grace is the Christian's main contribution." “…The world can do anything the church can do except one thing – it cannot show grace.”

Yancey also shares great examples of Christian ministers and churches that have the Jesus' distinguishing mark – not political correctness or moral superiority but – LOVE. I believe homosexuality is sin and so does divorce which is very prevalent in Christianity today. Abortion is another issue. Woman preaching in the church issue recently where John MacArthur, a Bible teacher, told Beth Moore, a Bible Study author, to "go home." What is this? As Yancey advice in the book and so here I say: we Christians can have firm views about ethical behavior or bold stand about the theological matter but we MUST demonstrate love foremost. Love allows us to be compassionate, vulnerable and empathy. When the church displays God's love and grace first without discounting justice and sin, we show the world: the real Jesus. The One who the world hate and at the same time attracted to. This statement by Yancey is so powerful: "The world thirsts for grace. When grace descends, the world falls silent before it." Amen!

There are so many lessons that I learned from this book. I've underlined and made notes. I will reread it (together with the newer book, 2014, Vanishing Grace). Yancey is such a good story-teller. Although he is a journalist, I see him as a theologian. Usually, when I read a book, I research it: read articles, reviews, listen to podcast interviews and YouTube videos. Some people disagree with Yancey and some of his writings are controversial. No write is flawless. With that said, I want to recommend fully this book especially to Christian leaders who have greater influence in shaping the way people think about the Church and Christianity in general. If you've been hurt by the un-grace believers, read this book too. In fact, come back to God or draw near to Him. Remember this: "There is nothing [you] can do to make God love [you] more. There is nothing [you] can do to make God loves [you] less." 

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 
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Monday, November 4, 2019

As A Man Thinketh #5 No Victimized Mindset, Take Responsibility


A person is buffeted by circumstances so long as he believes himself to be the creature of outside conditions
(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

One of the great weaknesses of our society today is the growing attitude of victimization. Many people claim themselves to be victims of some outside force. “I don’t know the story of the Bible because my pastor doesn’t teach me…”; “If that driver hadn’t pulled out in front of me…”; “I am like this because of my parents…”

When we are victims of circumstances, or as James Allen says, a “creature of outside conditions,” we have no power. We have given over the power in our life to the circumstances. The longer we give power to our circumstances the worst our circumstances become. In his other book, Above Life’s Turmoil, Allen writes, “You imagine your circumstances as being separate from yourself, but they are intimately related to your thought world. Nothing appears without an adequate cause.”

To get control of our circumstances we must first acknowledge personal responsibility for being where we are. That was the hardest part for me because the ‘victim’ in all of us doesn’t want to take that responsibility.

When we take responsibility, we must then take control of our thoughts. And, yes, in the beginning, that can be hard. It seems sometimes that it’s our nature to first think negatively. But that’s just because it’s the habit we’ve developed. And like any habit, it can change by replacing it with the habit of thinking the right way.

Emmet Fox once writes: “You are not happy because you are well. You are well because you are happy. You are not depressed because the trouble has come to you, but trouble has come because you are depressed. You can change your thoughts and feelings, and then the outer things will change to correspond, and indeed there is no other way of working.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 
References:
1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen


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As A Man Thinketh #4 The Most Basic and Logical Principle



Good thoughts and actions can never produce bad results; bad thoughts and actions can never produce good results. This is but saying that nothing can come from corn but corn, nothing from nettles but nettles
(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

Most everyone understands the biblical concept of sowing and reaping because we can grasp the simplicity of logic. If we were to plant durian on our farm, we wouldn’t expect apple to come up. But even though we can grasp the logic, we don’t always act as if we understand the power of this principle. And we certainly don’t act as if this principle will affect us.

An example: For many years my morning ritual began with video games (or PSP to be exact). Most mornings spending an hour or more on games and morning news before dashing off the office. I haven't realized then that our minds are most impressionable immediately upon rising in the morning and just before sleep in the evening. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise to me that my sowing of these thoughts would reap an ‘attitude’ at my workplace (impatient, demanding, shouting, etc.).

I gave up my morning ritual seven years ago and replaced it with a habit of reading. I read my Bible or book of the week and on the way to work, I listened to motivational or self-development audiobooks. When I sow “good thoughts” and thus I’ll reap “good results.” The Apostle Paul wrote, “You’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse” (Philippians 4:8, The Message).

We always reap what we sow and that is especially true with our thoughts. As Emmet Fox writes, “The secret of life then is to control your mental states, for if you will do this the rest will follow. To accept sickness, trouble, and failure as unavoidable, and perhaps inevitable, is folly because it is this very acceptance by you that keeps these evils in existence. Man is not limited by his environment. He creates his environments with his beliefs and feelings. To suppose otherwise is like thinking that the tail can wag the dog.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 
References:
1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen


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As A Man Thinketh #3 Don't Dwell Upon the Mistakes of Yesterday (Move On)



Do not dwell upon the sins and mistakes of yesterday so exclusively as to have no energy and mind left for living rightly today, and do not think that the sins of yesterday can prevent you from living purely today
(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

It’s been said that the majority of conversations by men over forty are about the past. Sometimes it’s about the ‘good old days’ and sometimes it’s about the deals gone bad, the ‘if I only had’ stories, the missed opportunities, etc.

Letting our “sins and mistakes of yesterday” dominate our thinking today robs us of our present joy and our future happiness. It causes us to miss the opportunity of today! John C. Maxwell, in his outstanding best-seller Failing Forward, gives some great practical advice: “To move forward today, you must learn to say goodbye to yesterday’s hurts, tragedies, and baggage. You can’t build a monument to past problems and fail forward.”

Take time right now to list the negative events from your past that may still be holding you hostage. For each item you list, go through the following exercise:

1)    Acknowledge the pain
2)    Grieve the loss
3)    Forgive the person
4)    Forgive yourself
5)    Determine to release the event and move on

Your best days are definitely ahead of you if you treat your “mistakes” as necessary lessons to be learned. If you understand that each lesson brings with it a certain amount of wisdom, you can understand how truly enhanced your life is becoming. Many people can’t achieve the success of their dreams because they won’t leave their past behind. They won’t tear down the monuments they’ve built to their old hurts and problems. “Don’t dwell upon the sins and mistakes of yesterday.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 
References:
1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen


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As A Man Thinketh #2 You Are Today Due to the Books that You (or Don't) Read


People are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves; they therefore remain bound
(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

We spend hundreds of ringgit a year for clothing, cosmetics, body products and other items to change or improve our outward appearance but very little money or time to change our inward condition. Many people easily spend hours a day online, going to gym, playing games, watching series and movies but find every reason in the world not to spend even a few minutes a day to improving their minds.

Since it is our thoughts that determine the life we will have, you must focus on doing those things that will change your thoughts, and nothing is more effective at changing your thoughts than reading the right books. Charlie ‘Tremendous’ Jones writes, “You are today the same you’ll be in five years from now, except for two things: the people you meet and the books you read. The people you meet can’t always be with you, but what you read in books can remain with you a lifetime. How often we hear of individuals who began a new era in their lives from the reading of a single book.”

Are you a book reader? Why not start a new habit today? Spend just 15 minutes every day in the morning or before going to bed or whenever you’re most concentrate and focus. Read from a personal development book or biography of someone you admire (ask me if you want my book suggestions on both topics). At the end of a year you will have read about 12 books – at the end of a five years about 60 books! Through your changed thoughts you will have become much more like the “vision you enthrone in your heart.”

As English writer Aldous Huxley observed, “Every person who knows how to read has it in his power to magnify himself, to multiply the ways in which he exists, to make his life full, significant, and interesting.” Think about it!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 
References:
1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen


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As A Man Thinketh #1 Don't Limit Your Mind


A person is limited only by the thoughts that he chooses
(James Allen, As A Man Thinketh)

You are not limited to the life you now live. It has been accepted by you as the best you can do at this moment. Any time you’re ready to go beyond the limitations currently in your life, you’re capable of doing that by choosing different thoughts. Don’t limit yourself.

Cynthia Kersey author of Unstoppable writes about this amazing story of George Dantzig. As a college student, George studied very hard and always late into the night. So late that he overslept one morning, arriving 20 minutes late for class. He quickly copied the two maths problems on the board, assuming they were the homework assignment. It took him several days to work through the two problems, but finally, he had a breakthrough and dropped the homework on the professor's desk the next day.

Later, on a Sunday morning, George was awakened at 6 a.m. by his excited professor. Since George was late for class, he hadn't heard the professor announce that the two unsolvable equations on the board were mathematical mind teasers that even Albert Einstein hadn't been able to answer.  But George Dantzig, working without any thoughts of limitation, had solved not one, but two problems that had stumped mathematicians for thousands of years. Simply put, George solved the problems because he didn't know he couldn't.

Bob Proctor tells us to “keep reminding yourself that you have tremendous reservoirs of potential within you, and therefore you are quite capable of doing anything you set your mind to. All you must do is figure out how you can do it, not whether or not you can. And once you have made your mind up to do it, it’s amazing how your mind begins to figure out how.” Think about it!


THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 
References:
1. As A Man Thinketh (1903) by James Allen
2. Day by Day with James Allen (2003) by Vic Johnson
3. Unstoppable: 45 Powerful Stories of Perseverance and Triumph from People Just Like You (1998) by Cynthia Kersey

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Sunday, November 3, 2019

Leaders, Failure Is the Back Door to Success



In his little book, Failure: The Back Door to Success (1975), Pastor Erwin Lutzer makes these points:

> We forget that God is a specialist; He is well able to work our failures into His plans

> Heaven will be filled with surprises! Many ‘successful’ Christians will be nobodies, and some whose lives were strewn with the wreckage of one failure after another will be great in the Kingdom

> If money is a basis of judging success or failure; it is obvious that Jesus Christ was a failure!

> The reason we think there are great differences among Christians is that we compare our lives with those of other believers. When we compare ourselves with God, those differences are negligible. One molehill is nearly the height of another if you measure them all against the Himalayas

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 
Blog: https://www.richardangelus.me/                  


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Friday, November 1, 2019

12 Rules for Life #12 Pat a Cat When You Encounter One on the Street (Summary)



This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“Set aside some time to talk and to think about the illness or other crisis and how it should be managed every day. Do not talk or think about it otherwise. If you do not limit its effect, you will become exhausted, and everything will spiral into the ground. This is not helpful. Conserve your strength. You’re in a war, not a battle, and a war is composed of many battles. You must stay functional through all of them. When worries associated with the crisis arise at other times, remind yourself that you will think them through, during the scheduled period”
(Jordan Peterson)

This final rule is mainly autobiographical and Peterson tells us about tragedy and pain. When tragic things are in front of us and we’re powerless, we must keep our eyes open for those little things that make life worthwhile. The title of this chapter inspired by the author’s experience of observing a local stray cat and watching it adapt to its surroundings in a harsh environment.

When you feel that your life is crewed up there is a way to make it easier to handle until you make it back on your feet. That is to shorten your “temporal horizon.” Stop thinking about what’s going to happen in the next months. Think about what and how you can improve today’s day or maybe just the next hours. Shrink the time frame until you can eventually handle the rest of it and this is how you adjust to devastation. It’s very important to not give up even in the worst situations, even if you’re at a place you’d rather not be, always try to look for what’s meaningful and worthwhile. “When you are going for a walk and your head is spinning a cat will show up and if you pay attention to it then you will get a reminder for just fifteen seconds that the wonder of Being might make up for the ineradicable suffering that accompanies it,” wrote Peterson, “Pet a cat when you encounter one on the street.”

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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12 Rules for Life #11 Don't Bother Children When They Are Skateboarding (Summary)



This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“If you think tough men are dangerous, wait until you see what weak men are capable of”
(Jordan Peterson)

This rule is essentially about masculinity (you might not agree with me). Peterson tells us that when children do all kinds of this crazy stuff on skateboards and handrails (or in Malaysia, play in the rain or at the playground or outside the house yard), we should let them be. Of course, it might be dangerous but it’s important for them to develop masculinity, competence, take risk and face danger. Normally, a lot of rebellious behavior in school is called “toxic masculinity” but Peterson believes that the benefits are bigger than the probably problematic situations.

When people are untrammeled and feel encouraged, they prefer to live on the edge. By living this way, they can be confident in their experience and confront the chaos that helps them develop and grow. They’re made for that reason, to enjoy risk (some of them more than others). Besides, if they are overprotected, they will fail when something dangerous or unexpected will suddenly occur, which inevitably will happen sometime – eventually. So why not let them develop toughness?

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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12 Rules for Life #10 Be Precise In Your Speech (Summary)



This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“To be precise in your speech does two things... it specifies your goal and it reduces uncertainty.”
(Jordan Peterson)

According to Peterson, there is an undivided connection between communication and reality. Language takes what’s unknown from chaos and gives it a name making it into a thing. Once that thing is addressed with a name then you can control it. A simple example would be the feeling of touch. Imagine that you see a pot in front of you for the first time. Without touching it you don’t know what’s wrong with it. Once you touch it you feel it’s too hot to hold it for too long. So, you give it a “name” – a hot pot. Now you can do something about it and use a pair of heatproof gloves to do your job.

On the other hand, the unnameable is terrifying, at least much more than the nameable. As an example, the movie The Ring didn’t describe and name the evil at all. Objectively speaking, in this movie the scary scenes are very few in number in comparison with other horror thrillers. It’s all about the unnameable. If you can’t name something then that makes it more terrifying to you. It also makes you feel weaker against it if you don’t actually know what it is. That’s why, according to Peterson, precise speech is important. I can bring things out of the realm of unspeakable. Words are not to be underestimated as they have creative power. Don’t create more marks and darkness by imprecise speech!

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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12 Rules for Life #9 Assume that the Person You are Listening to Might Know Something You Don't (Summary)



This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“The great majority of us could not listen; we would find ourselves compelled to evaluate because listening would seem too dangerous. So the first requirement is courage, and we do not always have it.”
(Carl Rogers)

When people argue about something, they often fall in the trap of trying to win over that argument and miss the true point of a good conversation. That is to come-out-wiser-than-you mentality when into it. First of all, winning over an argument does not necessarily mean that your thinking was smarter. If you happen to be more verbally fluent than the others, chances are against him even though he might be wiser than you, because as long as he cannot express his opinions with ease he can’t win because you don’t give him fair chances to win. And as mentioned before: “It’s not about winning.”

The best thing to do is to take good advantage of what someone is trying to tell you. Give him or her a chance to fully explain and make you understand what he or she is exactly thinking. Who knows maybe, in the end, you could find his or her ideas or suggestions better than some of yours and prevent you from facing future problems. “If you listen, instead, without premature judgment, people will generally tell you everything they are thinking—and with very little deceit. People will tell you the most amazing, absurd, interesting things.” Peterson even says to “listen to your enemies.” Surely, they will lie about you, but also be sure that they will be frank about things that your friends might not see or don’t dare to tell you. Learn to separate the wheat from the chaff.

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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12 Rules for Life #8 Tell the Truth - Or, At Least, Don't Lie (Summary)



This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“If your life is not what it could be, try telling the truth. If you cling desperately to an ideology, or wallow in nihilism, try telling the truth. If you feel weak and rejected, and desperate, and confused, try telling the truth. In Paradise, everyone speaks the truth. That is what makes it Paradise. Tell the truth. Or, at least, don’t lie.”

“To tell the truth is to bring the most habitable reality into Being. Truth builds edifices that can stand a thousand years. Truth feeds and clothes the poor, and makes nations wealthy and safe. Truth reduces the terrible complexity of a man to the simplicity of his word, so that he can become a partner rather than an enemy. Truth makes the past truly past, and makes the best use of the future's possibilities. Truth is the ultimate, inexhaustible natural resource. It's the light in the darkness. See the truth. Tell the truth.”
(Jordan Peterson)

One of the hardest things to do sometimes is telling the truth. Truth can be harsh and there are also times difficult to sense it. However, it’s very easy for us to know when we are lying. Consequent, when we don’t know the truth or we find it hard to tell it, then the next best option we have it to simply not to lie. Truth is very important in our lives as it is associated with meaning, according to Peterson. Only truth can bring you out of trouble, maybe not immediately sometimes, but in the long run, you’ll have everyone’s trust. There will be cases that you won’t know what to do but remember this: Start by just telling the truth! It will make it easier to face any situation.

On the other hand, lying makes you weak. Most of the time, the moment you lie you start immediately feeling strange, weak and insecure. The others can sense it too and start doubting you. Even if they happen to not be able to prove you wrong, you still are not satisfied because you know you’re lying and you’re fake. Lying is “the antithesis of meaning and reality.” The only thing you could achieve by lying is only get away from a situation, but only temporarily. As Peterson says: “It was the great and the small lies of the Nazi and Communist states that produced the deaths of millions of people.”

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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12 Rules for Life #7 Pursue What Is Meaningful, Not What Is Expedient (Summary)



This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“Order is not enough. You can’t just be stable, and secure, and unchanging, because there are still vital and important new things to be learned. Nonetheless, chaos can be too much. You can’t long tolerate being swamped and overwhelmed beyond your capacity to cope while you are learning what you still need to know. Thus, you need to place one foot in what you have mastered and understood and the other in what you are currently exploring and mastering. Then you have positioned yourself where the terror of existence is under control and you are secure, but where you are also alert and engaged. That is where there is something new to master and some way that you can be improved. That is where meaning is to be found.”
(Jordan Peterson)

Meaning is about the way you protect yourself from “all the suffering that life entails.” All people get emotionally wounded by life so they have to find something to make the pain worthwhile. According to Peterson, meaning is like an instinct or a form of vision that lets you know whether you are in the right place or not. The right place is somewhere in between chaos and order. If you stay safe within order all the time and facing only things you understand, you won’t be able to develop further and won’t grow. On the other hand, if you stay within chaos then you’ll get lost. The best choice is to leave your safe point and try to risk for anything that’s worthwhile, without losing your path to chaos. “We require routine and tradition. That’s order. Order can become excessive, and that’s not good, but chaos can swamp us, so we drown— and that is also not good,” writes Peterson, so, “We need to stay on the straight and narrow path.”

Expediency [synonyms for convenience] is what people do to get themselves out of trouble here and now, but the drawback of this is that “they sacrifice the future for the present.” That means that expediency is only good for temporarily escaping your problems. In order to countermeasure this – aim high. Stop doing whatever will make you avoid your problems temporarily and try to see around. Understand what things you can improve and improve them. You’ll eventually gain knowledge and more experience but be cautious not to fall in the trap of becoming arrogant and remain humble (I have to admit that is as hard as keeping the balance between chaos and order but both are worthy to keep in mind).

Peterson also mentions the importance of being aware of our weaknesses. These may be our secret resentments, cowardice, hatred and other failings. Learn to be lenient when you accuse others because “all people conceal evil impulses.”

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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12 Rules for Life #6 Set Your House In Perfect Order Before You Criticize the World (Summary)



This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“Don’t blame capitalism, the radical left, or the iniquity of your enemies. Don’t reorganize the state until you have ordered your own experience. Have some humility. If you cannot bring peace to your household, how dare you try to rule a city?”
(Jordan Peterson)

Wherever we look, we see many abnormalities and a lot of things to complain about said Peterson. It’s true that life is tragic – for most people at least – and surely there is malevolence. However, if we dwell on it too long, it is of no benefit at all since we become more and more resentful. Cursing and criticizing all the time is pointless and we should start taking more meaningful actions.

First of all, we have to correct ourselves. Being busy with criticizing society all the time makes you neglect yourself and you ignore that you may be similar to what you are despising. So, take good care of yourself first, stop doing anything that you know to be wrong and start doing and saying only things that make you proud. The first step is to bring peace to your (own) household and after that, you can criticize the government and country (in Malaysia) and attempt to contribute to change the society you are living in for the best. This reminds me of Mother Teresa's words, “If each of us would only sweep our own doorstep, the whole world would be clean.”

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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12 Rules for Life #5 Do Not Let Your Children Do Anything that Makes You Dislike Them (Summary)



This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“Modern parents are simply paralyzed by the fear that they will no longer be liked or even loved by their children if they chastise them for any reason. They want their children’s friendship above all and are willing to sacrifice respect to get it. This is not good. A child will have many friends, but only two parents – if that – and parents are more, not less, than friends.”

“If a child has not been taught to behave properly by the age of four, it will forever be difficult for him or her to make friends”
(Jordan B. Peterson)

This is Peterson’s advice for parents, not mine. He said that parents are human beings too, meaning that they are not perfect and they can easily make mistakes which can affect their kids. Parents are not always as nice as they think. People often will take revenge on someone who messes them up, even on their own children, because it happens unconsciously. You might think, “Oh this is impossible, I’d never do anything to hurt my kid,” but all people have a “subconscious proclivity for tyranny” deeply rooted within them and that tyranny is more likely to be shown against someone who is much less powerful than you, for example, your children. So, hunger, stress, fatigue or even a bad day at work are more than enough to make you lose your temper and become unreasonable over your children.

Peterson states some principles on the disciplinary procedure. #1 Parents should limit the rules, and #2 Use the least possible force to enforce them. They also #3 Need to understand how much they should be harsh, vengeful, arrogant, resentful or angry each time in front of their kids. Parents are somewhat of “proxies for the real world” who will teach and prepare their children to be socially desirable for the world outside [You can learn more about this Rule #5 in this YouTube video, CLICK HERE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=krfhpUrE6ys&feature=youtu.be]

THINK BIG. START SMALL. GO DEEP.
 

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